I just want to notice you all that I'm not dead, I'm still practicing sorry if I'm being so in-active here on deviantart.
Pls bare it with me and be patient while I practice and improve my skills.

Anne<3

These past days I've been posting more cheerful/colorful/bright pictures. I realized that most of my artworks are dark themed, well.. I want to change that. It kinda depress me somehow to draw dark/gloomy/gory stuffs (although I admit I love it, and it's one of the ways for me to let go of my anger/problems/and so on).

But hey, I gotta change you know. It's way better to draw and LOVE something light and colorful.
So I decided to not/never (maybe) draw any dark themed pictures anymore.

Anyways, guess that's all I wanna share now~

Yeah, you know that feeling...
You know that ANNOYING feeling when someone is 'like' watching you.
But it gets scary when you know there is 'no one' there.

This is not a poem or whatsoever, it's just something I want to write. Not sharing or telling. Just. Write. About it.
You can run but you can't hide, yes that's true.
No matter where you run you know that someone or 'thing' is following and watching you.
You want to shake it off but you can't, you don't know how..

I always tell myself to forget about it. Not to even care about it.
Think positive and just walk away.. I always tell myself to ignore it
But hey, I can't.

That seriously annoying weird feeling of someone is watching/following you won't end.
So what, eventually you'll see it in the end.
It's not just your feelings.. it's a fact. There IS someone/something watching AND following you.
So what you gonna do? shake it off? fight it? It's all up to you
That is.. IF you're brave enough.

Sometimes or.. should I say 'always'..
I think that black and red will come back. Even if it can't be in the (my) reality world..
It will comes back in my dreams..

PS : I might make a picture describing this. situation.

I watched Princess Mononoke for like.. twice now. And I'm still gonna watch it over and over again, IT'S JUST AMAZING!
I just drew a pict of her, didn't expect I would get better result! Pls check it on my gallery x3

Anyways, I'm also thinking on drawing some Homestuck fan art. Oh gosh how I love thee XD lolol
Still not done reading it, long long way up there eh haha

So yeah anyways, if u haven't watch the movie princess mononoke go watch it, it's really awsome.
and if u also haven't read homestuck, GOOOO READ IIIIT! <333

I want to thank to all you guys that keep looking and watching me trying everyday improve my art XD LOL
I really really appreciate it to all of you who favorited my pictures~ ^^ I also want to thank for your lovely comments.
I never really expected for anyone to notice my 'tutorials'

Still I will never stop improving and practicing EVERYDAY. Yes believe me I draw EVERYDAY haha
For my tutorials, please notice that I'm not a pro yet, I'm still learning. So I'm sorry if there's any disadvantages in any of my tuts.
Some people asked me to do commission or if that I let them print my pictures. FOR NOW, I don't accept any of those.
I'm still learning and I want to be way better than I am now. I want to give you guys my BEST shot. So talking about commissions and such .. let's think about that later on x3

Anyways I know I don't have that many watchers yet XD I've been in Deviantart for like.... 7 months now? But I wasn't active.
I didn't do digital painting yet. Just posting my 'second life' work. Like in world game clients and such, if you're confused about it just google about second life lol (but I think most of you guys know it ) Anyways since I didn't/don't play second life that often anymore, I started to do digital painting. So since.. last year or.. I think since this January 2012, I started to do digital painting. So yea I'm trying my best to fill my gallery with my artwork here, keep up with me hehehe~

I also want to ask how do I upload my photoshop brushes to deviantart? cuz I tried and it failed XD it won't load :C
I made my first brush pack and wanted to share it here (though it's not really good or special lolol)

Ok so THE POINT what I want to actually say is that... should I make a tumblr to post my art? lol
I've seen a lot of amazing artists have tumblr to post their pictures there. I do have tumblr already but that one is kinda.. fcked up. I just keep on rebloging stuffs from people and yeah.. kinda just for fun. I always wanted to have my own blog to post my artwork.

K so anyways other than that.. I also want to ask if it's better to have premium membership or not.. I mean like.. is it better for me to have a premium account NOW or 2 years later when I improve more? That's all I wanna say about 'premium membership' thingy.
There's actually a lot of stuffs I wanna share and talk about with you guys but meh oh well.. I'll post that later on


with love,
Anne<3

All my friends tell me I should move on
I'm lying in the ocean, singing your song
Ahhh, that's how you sang it
Loving you forever, can't be wrong
Even though you're not here, won't move on
Ahhh, that's how we played it

And there's no remedy for memory your face is
Like a melody, it won't leave my head
Your soul is haunting me and telling me
That everything is fine
But I wish I was dead

Everytime I close my eyes
It's like a dark paradise
No one compares to you
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side
Everytime I close my eyes
It's like a dark paradise
No one compares to you
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side

All my friends ask me why I stay strong
Tell 'em when you find true love it lives on
Ahhh, that's why I stay here

And there's no remedy for memory your face is
Like a melody, it won't leave my head
Your soul is haunting me and telling me
That everything is fine
But I wish I was dead

Everytime I close my eyes
It's like a dark paradise
No one compares to you
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side
Everytime I close my eyes
It's like a dark paradise
No one compares to you

But that there's no you, except in my dreams tonight,
Oh oh oh, ha ha ha
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight
Oh oh oh, ha ha ha
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight

There's no relief, I see you in my sleep
And everybody's rushing me, but I can feel you touching me
There's no release, I feel you in my dreams
Telling me I'm fine

Everytime I close my eyes
It's like a dark paradise
No one compares to you
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side
Everytime I close my eyes
It's like a dark paradise
No one compares to you

But that there's no you, except in my dreams tonight,
Oh oh oh, ha ha ha
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight
Oh oh oh, ha ha ha
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight








...... that is all I have to say.. about how I feel.. should I give up on him or not

Meh it's been a while since I update my journal.. cuz I don't even care LOL
Anyways, I just want to highlight this artist "sakimichan" (I do believe most of you all know who she is)
She's very popular and an amazing artist!!

My latest work "My Heart" was inspired by her picture "silent glow"
Check that out (the link is on my picture's description)

Soooo yeh nothing much to say. Oh and I guess I would like to share about my rl life a bit XD
At last, by the end of this school term, I'll be moving to a homeschooling program (though I don't really study just at home, I still go to school but only twice a week). I really want to focus on my art and take the TOEFL test thingy bingy lingy haha (since next year I'm planning to go to an art collage in Australia)

Other than that, I'm just living the life as always. Drawing, watching vids on youtube and bla bla.
AND OH YEH, my laptop is broken lol, I'm using my mom's for now. XD
The service center told me, my laptop will be done in.. uhh 1/2 day(s) more. But I guess tomorrow it'll be done woohooo!!

Guess that's all to say right now x3

hey guys, just made a new picture of celestia and chrysalis XD
check it out x3

and oh, i just LOOOOOVE the new episode. ITS EPIIICC >

hey guys,

I'm thinking to get a premium membership, but since I don't have paypal, i can only borrow my mom's XD lol
My mom asked me if it's ok that I use her paypal, because the email and other personal informations I used when I made this account
is of course different from my mom's.

So... I'm just wondering if it's ok or not. If not, is there another way to do it?
Pls tell me how D:

thanks!

Anne<3

No words.. just amazing. Cuz the story is just like mine in rl life
Guess this movie is a message not to meet any strangers XD lol

[link]

Yes you kept calling me your angel
Yes I'm always nice to you
Yes I always take care of you
Yes I know I might be wrong as well

BUT I HATE your bullshits

You say you never go there anymore but you are
You always RANDOMLY go away without telling me the FUCK why
BLERGH!!


WAWFAWBWJABSJBCHDBFVJND GFHDGVC!!! D:<
RAAAGGGEE!
RELEASES INNER DEMON!

no lol I shall be nice to you as an angel I am
while I watch you dying ;D

HHA! AHA! AHAHHAHA!

nah I will wait for what will happen between us..
yea..
maybe, lol

Soooo tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrreeeeeeeeeeeed
homeworks.. at.. last.. IT IZ ALL DONE! BISH XD

MEWH~

say...

PHOTOSHOP TIEM!!

I'm quitting school, probably by the end of this week.. or next week.
I just can't stand it, everything is way too fucked up.. I can't stand all the fcking shit going on everywhere...
Most of my friends have changed. Everything in this new year is all... weird... odd..
Well I'm still greatfull for all the things I have, but it's not wrong to have my own decision right?

Well.. I can go to homeschooling, and take some mini courses/lessons for basic subjects like math, science, english, and so on..
Especially for art, I can take some good courses near my home. I want to learn graphic design and also music, I love playing the piano C;
Urgh.. I really don't know what to do, cuz I'm also scared if I take that kind of path I won't be able to enter a good art collage.
But I think I still can, as long I have good marks... especially TOEFL (since I'm planning to move to Australia)

For all these past years.. I'm tired. I'm really tired.
I need some rest... I really need to relax and feel peaceful..
It's not that bad tho, but some stuffs are just too... much for me.
Too depressing..

So .. well.. we'll see what's gonna happen soon :/

sighs... -___-'

Checked it to the Korean doctor and it seems that nothing is wrong with my kidney.
WOOHOO IM SAFE XD lols~



Welp happy that I still can do my paintings
/)^,^(\

sighs.. gonna check my blood to the doctor tomorrow.
My mom thought it's just my muscle, but I do have a feeling something is wrong with my kidney, it really hurts everytime I move..
I hope nothing bad is going on ._.

sad face
( super sad face

lol~

Yay! 1,000 pageviews in 2 months Lol~
........
........
...............
..............meh i duno wat to write


meh so



bored
.
.
.
.
.
. mai stomach hurts :/

Yes one thing I should confess is that since 2 years ago, I've been a very very VERY emotional person.
I.. myself, don't like the fact that I'm actually a bipolar... I'm still not even sure about it but I do get angry, pissed, irritated, sad easily..
I don't even know what the problems are but for sure, I do hate having these .. really HARD times, trying to cool the fck out of myself..

I can be insane at times...
When I'm really REALLY angry, I can be a total mad/insane girl..
I can scream out soooo loud that my neighbor can hear
No, I don't like that.
It's disturbing and tiring for my body, mind, and soul..
No, this is not a poem.. It is something I need to let it all out.. and flow away.

well well.. SOPA ...
i dont rlly know wat to say about this...
for sure..

if you people don't want to witness hell... don't make me mad...
if you don't want to make me mad....

DON'T EVEN DARE TO BLOCK OR TAKE DAOWN ANY WEBSITES!!!
NO CENSORSHIP!!!
HELL FREEDOM!!

i mean..
freedom.. *fluttershy's* yay..

OMG OMG OMG!!!

Right after 5 minutes later when I started a donation pool, somebody gave me 1 month premium membership oh god !!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!
Gosh I'll work harder then ever !' xD haha lol

For now I'm out of town ..
Il be back 2 days later ~

<3 Anne